Part 3 

Lou’s is kinda long but enjoy!

Liam (His POV) - I haven’t seen her in days and I’m going crazy. She thought she wasn’t good enough for me and that killed me. That wasn’t it at all. I loved her, I really did. Ava was just a one time thing. With (Y/N) being gone, it made me realize the mistake I made. I needed her back. I drove over to her house and found her sitting in her backyard. I walked up quietly so she wouldn’t know I was there. There she sat, facing the sunrise, just watching the colorful sky with what I thought was happiness. But no. When I walked closer I could see tears in her eyes and a weak smile on her face. “(Y/N)?” Her head snapped around and her gaze met mine. “Liam?” I went over and kneeled in front of her. “I’m so sorry babe. Please, please forgive me and come back to me.” Her head hung low on her shoulders. “I don’t think I can give you everything you need Liam.” “No, no..” I lifted her head and made her look at me. “You are everything I need (Y/N), I just made a dumb mistake that I wish I could take back. So please, take me back and know that everything will be okay.” She slowly started to nod her head. “Okay Li.”

Niall (Your POV) - I wanted to hate him so bad, but no matter how hard I tried, I just couldn’t. He was the love of my life, but I just witnessed something horrible. I left the stadium and ran to my car. I told myself I was going to speed off, I told myself I was going to leave him, but I couldn’t. I sat in the car and cried, thinking about Niall and our relationship. How could he do this? I waited until the concert was over before I got up the courage to go back in. I went backstage and found the boys all standing around happy with the night’s performance. But when I walked in, they all stopped and stared, then looked to Niall. “Um, can I talk to Niall guys?” They just nodded their heads and left. “(Y/N)? You came back…” “I need to know one thing Niall.” He just frantically nodded his head. “Anything.” “Do you really love me?” “Yes, yes I swear I do babe. I swear. This was just a mistake, a bad mistake. I love you babe, I always have.” That was all I needed to hear. “Okay.” “So…we’re still together then?” “Yes Niall.” “Oh babe!” He ran over and picked me up and spun me. “Thank you thank you thank you. I love you. I’m sorry.” 

Harry (His POV) - It’s been 3 weeks and (Y/N) still hasn’t came back for the rest of her things. Everyday I hoped she would walk through my door, but she never did. My stomach was in knots, knowing I was the one who broke us up. After she left, after what she said to me, I knew in my heart I had made the wrong choice. She didn’t call, she didn’t show, nothing. I let the girl I loved walk out of my life like nothing, and now I was paying the price for it. Then one day, I heard my doorbell ring. I rushed to answer it and saw what I had been waiting for: (Y/N). But she didn’t look good. She looked like she hadn’t eaten in weeks, she had bags under her eyes, and her eyes just looked dull. “Sorry to bother you, but I came to get my things…” I walked out onto the porch to stand next to her. “(Y/N)….” She put her hand up to stop me. “Please don’t Harry, I just need to get my things and leave.” She started to walk in but I stopped her. “Babe listen to me.” I turned her around and could see tears in her eyes. “I know you said you couldn’t be friends with me because you love me……..then let’s not be friends…….take me back so we can be lovers once again….they way we used to be.”She looked down at the floor for what seemed like ever and took her time answering me. Finally her head came back up and she smiled. “Are you sure?” “Of course babe, I love you and don’t want to lose you.” “Okay Styles.”

Louis (Your POV) - I got a call one day weeks later from Liam. “(Y/N)?” “Um…yeahh….” I was confused right about now. Liam never called me. “Hey sorry to bother you, but I was calling about Lou..” “eh, stop right there Li, I don’t wanna hear about him.” “No (Y/N) really, we need your help.” “Fine, what Liam?” “Okay well Lou’s been locked in his bathroom for the past week and won’t come out…he’s not eating anything and only drinking and we’re all worried about him. He says he won’t talk to anyone but you…..so can you please come help us? Not for Lou, but for us?” I thought about what he was saying and wondered if I even should. Lou did this to himself, why should I help him? But me being a nice person, of course I was going to.“Fine Li. I’ll be there in a bit.” I drove over there and found all the boys gathered around the bathroom door. They all looked relieved to see me there and ran to hug me. “(Y/N) thank god you’re here.” “Hmm, can you guys leave us alone for a bit?”“Sure.” They all left and I went over and sat by the door. “Lou?” I didn’t hear anything from the other side. “Louis?” Then I could hear him moving across the floor and resting his head against the door. “(Y/N)?” “Hi Louis.” I could hear him sigh. “Louis, you have to come out of the bathroom.” “I can’t.” “Why not?” “I can’t go out there knowing you won’t be there.” I could hear soft cries coming from him. I’m not going to lie, it made me sad hearing this. “I’m right here Louis. Just come out and see for yourself.” “I can’t.” “Lou…” “Because I know once I do, you’ll just leave again. I can’t handle that.” I could hear him backing away from the door and I broke down a little more. This just showed me how much I really did love him. I could forgive him, I could. “Babe, I promise I won’t leave, I’ll stay. I’ll be here when you get out…just please come out.” I waited for something..anything….but he didn’t do anything. I started to get up and was about to walk away when I heard the door creak open. “(Y/N)..” I turned to see him standing behind me, hair messed up, smelling, looking tired, but still my Lou. I walked over and hugged him. He cried on my shoulder and just held onto me.

A/N: The end!

Part 2 - His POV

Liam - I got home with a smile on my face. I know what I had just done, but I was still all giddy. But when I walked in, my smile fell. There (Y/N) was, with tears running down her face. She looked at me and stood up. It was then I noticed her bags by the door. “(Y/N)?” She walked over to me and showed a weak smile. “What’s happening?”Her left hand came up to my face and rubbed my cheek softly. Just like I had with Ava…….realization set in. “I’m sorry I wasn’t enough.” She gave me one last look and grabbed her bags. I stood there, shocked that she had seen. “No (Y/N) wait….” But she didn’t. She opened the door and walked out. Walked out of my life for what was the last time I thought I’d ever see her, because of something I chose to do.

Niall - I ran after her. I didn’t know she was here, I didn’t think I’d get caught, but I did. And I needed to fix this. “(Y/N)!” She only walked faster. “Babe..” I grabbed her arm and turned her to face me. But what I saw scared me. Her face was red, her eyes filled with anger, but most of all, hatred. She hated me now…”What Niall?! What do you want.” “Babe, please. Let me explain.” “Explain what? That you cheated on me thinking I wouldn’t see? Well guess what, I did. So goodbye Horan.” And she walked away leaving me feeling guilty and regretful. I just lost the love of my life because of some stupid girl I saw in the audience. I just wish I could take it back.

Harry - I returned home after I finished my lunch with Rachel. After (Y/N) showed up, I couldn’t shake this horrible feeling I had. She looked heartbroken, hurt, sad……I got home and went upstairs to find her quietly packing her bags. I leaned against the door and stayed silent. I could hear her silent cries and it hurt to see this. She finally noticed me and turned to me. “I’m just getting some of my things so I can leave tonight.” Then she went back to packing. I walked over to her and stopped her hand.“(Y/N)…..please forgive me.” She looked at me with tears in her eyes. She smiled at me and let out a laugh. “Not easy Styles.” I sat down and looked up at her. “Can we just still be friends? I do still care about you.” She put the last of her clothes in her bag and put it around her shoulder. “I can’t be friends with someone I love so much Harry.” And she walked out.

Zayn - After I kissed Perrie, I couldn’t bring myself to look at (Y/N). I saw her there, I knew she was there. I thought doing this would help me in forgiving her for what she did to me, but it didn’t. (Y/N) lied to me about being friends with her ex boyfriend, so I took revenge. But it didn’t make me feel any better. I looked at Perrie and just shook my head. “I’m sorry.” I grabbed my jacket and ran after (Y/N). It was raining and dark out, but I could make out her figure a few blocks in front of me. I ran as fast as I could, soon reaching her and grabbing onto her arm. But she didn’t stop walking. She was shivering, her breathing slow. I watched her with worry, her eyes were distant, cold. “(Y/N).” She finally stopped, still looking forward, not wanting to look at me. I came around to face her and looked at her. But her eyes still didn’t meet mine, but I could see her tears. I knew her well. “(Y/N), talk to me. Please.” “Was I that bad Zayn? Was I not good enough for you?” It hurt hearing that. I shook my head. “No, no (Y/N). You are perfect for me, I’m just an asshole. I’m sorry babe, I’m so sorry. Please forgive me.” She finally looked at me. She nodded her head and walked into my arms.

Louis - “Goodbye Louis.” Those words tore me apart. She walked out, leaving me to wallow in my own loneliness. I told her I’d never hurt her, but I did. Why did I? Why? I didn’t know the answer, but I knew I couldn’t watch the love of my life walk out. I ran to her. Just before she was going to take off, I caught her in time. “(Y/N) stop! Come back and talk to me.” “You promised Lou, you promised and I was stupid enough to believe you. I can’t do this.” “I know I did! I know! But I regret you seeing this, I regret doing this at all. Just please come back in. I love you so much I don’t want to lose you.” “You should of thought of that before you brought her back to our house and kissed her. For the last time, goodbye Louis.” And she sped away. My hands came up to my head and I fell to my knees. I yelled at the skies, screamed until my throat was hoarse. She hadn’t even been gone for 2 minutes and already I missed her so much

Lou’s POV

I spent the next few days gathering the things I needed to get her back. I went to a jewelery store and ordered something, then made a dinner reservation at a fancy restaurant and then made my way over to (Y/N)’s friend’s house. I put on nice clothes and hoped i looked presentable. I never usually did this stuff, but for her? I’d do anything. I got to the house and knocked on the door. He friend answered it and just looked at me. “Um, is (Y/N) here?” “Well yeahh but doesn’t mean I’m going to let you in. What are you doing here?” This friend never really liked me, which I understood but I mean what the hell. “I just need to talk to her (Y/F/N). Please.” “She doesn’t want to see you Louis.” “Is she where she can hear me then?” I could see her look over her shoulder and then back to me and nod.

Your POV

I sat in the living room with my back towards the door where Lou was, so I knew he was here. I could hear every word he was saying but I didn’t want to give in. I knew if I took one look at him I’d break. “(Y/N)!” I jumped when he yelled my name. I looked to (Y/F/N) and could see her still standing at the door, blocking him from my sight. I looked back to the wall and just stared. Don’t say anything, don’t say anything…”(Y/N) I know you can hear me babe. Please….just hear what I have to say.” I shut my eyes and started counting in my head. If I blocked him out maybe he’d leave. “You don’t have to say anything, just listen to me. I love you (Y/N). I love you so much I’m mad at myself for even muttering those words to you. But babe if I could take them back I would. You know I didn’t mean any of those things. I can respect your morals, I can respect you as a person, I can respect anything you want me to because that’s how much I love you. When I woke up and saw your things were done I went crazy. I can’t picture life without you now (Y/N). I need you in my life, now and always. No matter what. I can wait, I swear I can. Hell we never have to have sex if that’s what it takes, I just want you to come back to me.”

And he left it at that. I sat there and ran his words through. I couldn’t see him, but I could hear the emotion in his voice. It sounded regretful and sorry. He was sorry. And he loves me, still….after everything, he still loves me. Once I heard that I knew my love for him wasn’t gone. I slowly got up and walked over to the door. I stood behind (Y/F/N) and tapped her shoulder. She turned and nodded at me then left. I came face to face with Louis finally. His face lit up when he saw me and he smiled at me. That smile…..it always killed me. “(Y/N)…babe…” I didn’t say anything, I just walked up to him and threw myself in his arms. 

He wrapped his arms around me and held me tightly. “I missed you babe.” I just held him tighter. Finally he let go and set me down. “I have a surprise for you though. Go get ready and let’s go.” I nodded and walked back into my room to get ready. He sat patiently in the living room and waited. I finally finished after 30 minutes and came out to greet him. He was dressed nice so I put on a dress and heels. “You look lovely.”“Thank you.” He held out his arm. “C’mon, let’ go.” We walked out and he took me to his car. We drove for miles until we came to a fancy restaurant. It’s one we’ve never been to, but I’ve always admired. I was happy. We went in  and immediately got seated. As soon as the hostess left Lou put his menu down and came to kneel in front of me. “(Y/N), I love you so much….” He began to pull out a tiny black box, and I’ll admit, I sort of freaked. I didn’t think I was ready for marriage just yet. “Lou…” “Don’t worry, it’s not what you think.” I nodded my head and he resumed. “This, (Y/N), is something I’d like to give you to show you that I do respect you. I will wait for you no matter what, and I promise someday, I will marry you. Because I know you’re the one I want to spend the rest of my life with. But this for now, is a token of my love and appreciation to you. I know i don’t show it much, but I do love that you are in my life babe.” He opened the box and there was a white gold diamond ring set there. It was beautiful. It was plain, just like I liked it. 

He took it out and slipped it on my right ring finger. “So please, accept my apology and take me back babe. Come back home. I want you in my life.” His eyes pleaded with forgiveness as he looked up at me. I looked at the ring on my finger then to him. How could I not forgive him? I grabbed his hand and brought it up to my face. “I love you Lou.” He let out a huge sigh and smiled at me. “I love you too babe.” He got up and gave me a kiss on the lips and then hugged me. He went back to his seat and sat down a whole new man. “Ahh, not that that’s done, let’s eat at your favorite place.” And we did. After that everything went back to normal for him and I and he stayed true to his word. We married a year and a half later and that night of our wedding night, was the first time we ever made love. And I was so glad I waited.

Your POV

Meeting Louis Tomlinson was always in my dreams, but it coming true? It was just unbelievable. I met him while shopping with friends. I thought he was going to start hitting on my friend, but he didn’t. He came over and talked to me. That day he asked me for my number and we went out on a date. It was the best day of my life. And slowly since then, we’d been getting to know each other. 

We’ve been together for 6 months now. And to be honest, I was falling in love with him. He just didn’t know it yet. But I was scared, because there was something I was holding back. I’m 19 and I believe in no sex before marriage. I hadn’t told Louis this yet because I was scared he’d change his mind about me. He’s never tried to take our relationship to the next level, so I’ve never had a reason to tell him this. But I knew i needed to soon because I was going to tell him I love him, and I needed to know that he accepted my belief.

Today was our 7 month anniversary and we were celebrating. We went out to eat and saw a movie. But tonight Louis had drank more than usual. I was helping him into our room when he pulled me down on top of him. “You know (Y/N), I’m so glad I met you.” I laughed. He was drunk. “I’m glad too Lou.” I started to get up when he held on tighter. “Lou..” “Stay with me please.” Um? “Okay….” I layed down beside him and he turned towards me. I was planning on tell him I loved him, but I knew tonight wouldn’t be the night, I wanted him sober when I told him. 

He put his hand on my hip and start rubbing there. “(Y/N), I really like you.” His hand started to go under my shirt. “I really like you too Lou.” I went to stop his hand and he got mad. But he didn’t say anything. He went back to smiling at me with hazy eyes. But not even a minute later he put his hand back there. He tried pulling up my shirt again, only this time kissing me, thinking it’d distract me. But I knew what he was trying to do.

“Louis, stop.” I pulled his hand away again and this time he threw a fit. “Why? What’s wrong with us having sex? We’ve been together for 7 months now!” I sat up and looked down at him. “Because I’m not ready to Lou.” He huffed at me and said something under his breath. “What was that Louis?” “I said……that’s bullshit.” My eyes widened and I was starting to get mad. I knew he was drunk, but he didn’t need to say that to me. “What’s so wrong with no sex before marriage Lou?” He finally sat up and looked at me. “You’re one of those girls? Oh hell no.” He got up and stumbled over to the bathroom door. But I sat there, shocked that he just said that. I walked after him and found him in front of the toilet. “And what is wrong with that? You got something against that?” “Pssh, that’s a load of crud. If I wanna have sex, I’m going to have sex. And since you can’t give that to me, you might as well leave.” Then he started throwing up. 

I usually helped him with this part of the night, but not tonight. I didn’t want him to see me cry so I left. I got in my car and drove over to my friends house. She knew how I was, she knew what I wanted in life. And when I showed up crying on her doorstep, she immediately let me in. “What happened?” “I told Lou I didn’t want to have sex before marriage, and he basically told me to leave..I guess we broke up.” Her face turned to anger and she shook her head. “He doesn’t deserve you then hun, don’t worry about him.” “How can I not? I love him (Y/F/N)…I love him and I never even got the chance to tell him that. But him finding out about this, this changes everything. It shows me that he’s not willing to wait for me. And that he doesn’t love me.” I broke down even more.

Lou’s POV

I woke up in the bathroom with my hand in the toilet. Ugh, disgusting. My head was pounding and I was barely able to open my eyes. “(Y/N)!” She usually took care of me, why wasn’t I in bed? “(Y/N)!” I called for her again but she never came. I struggled to get up, but finally made it to the sink. I washed my hands and brushed my teeth. I looked at myself in the mirror and saw what a mess I was. I stumbled into the room and looked around. She wasn’t in here. I walked out into the living room and she wasn’t there either. Where was she? I walked back into our room and sat on the bed. But as I sat there and my vision became focused, I finally noticed something. The closet was open, and all of her things were gone from her side. I got up and walked over to it. I opened the other side and saw all of my things still there. I walked over the dresser and opened her drawers. Everything, everything was gone. 

What the hell happened?! I grabbed my phone and called her, but no answer. I kept calling, but all I was getting was her voicemail. “(Y/N), call me please. I can’t remember anything and I want to know where you are.” I hung up and just sat there. My head was hurting so bad I couldn’t focus my thoughts. I tried so hard to remember something from last night, but I couldn’t. All I remembered was going out for our anniversary and then nothing. But I know something happened, because (Y/N) would’ve been here helping me, she was always here. So what happened?

Zayn’s POV

I was laying down watching a movie when I heard my phone go off. It was a text message from Niall. I opened it to see what he had to say but was stunned when I opened it. I sat up and really looked at my phone. It was a picture of a baby girl sleeping peacefully. Along with the picture was Niall’s message. ‘Baby girl, 6lbs 4 oz, born at 2:34am and healthy. She looks like you mate. Just thought you should see for yourself.’ 

I looked at the picture in awe. He was right. She did look like me. I could feel tears start to fall as I stared at her. This little girl, I made this little girl, she was mine.,…..and I denied her? Looking at this now I regretted what I had told (Y/N) so much. She was right, how could I say that? One look at her and it all made sense. I needed to go see her. I jumped up and ran to my car. I sped as fast as I could to the hospital and ran inside. I frantically searched for the waiting room and found the boys standing there looking happy. When I walked in, they all looked at me and nodded their heads. I was out of breath so I couldn’t talk, but Niall walked up to me and just hugged me. All I could do was hug him back and cry. 

All it took was someone to hold me and I broke down. I broke down because I was such a jerk, I was an ass, and most of all, I hurt (Y/N). The others came around and hugged me and Niall. I missed them so much it hurt. But being here now was all I needed to know that they still cared. Finally they let go and just smiled at me. I nodded at them and then could see Harry walking down the hallway. When his eyes met mine, I could tell he wanted to be mad at me, but I think he appreciated me coming. I walked up to him and stood in front of him. I knew what I looked like. My eyes were red and puffy and my clothes wrinkled. But I was here. 

Harry stuck his hand out and waited for me to shake it. This was his sign of acceptance and forgiveness. I was happy to take his hand and then pulled him in for a hug. “Where is she?” “(Y/N)?” He pulled away to look at me. I just nodded my head. “She’s asleep in a room. I can take you to her. Do you want to see the baby first?” I didn’t know I’d be able to see her so my eyebrows shot up. “Can I?” Harry nodded his head and led me down a hallway. We came to a big window and behind it were all different babies. But I could spot her right away. My hand was pressed up to the window in awe. I started crying again. She was even more beautiful in person and I loved every moment of this. I looked at Harry and he just smiled. “(Y/N) hasn’t named her yet, so you’ll have to wait for her to wake up, but other than that, you can hold her.” I didn’t care if she didn’t have a name yet, I just wanted her in my arms. I went inside and got cleaned up before I picked her up. She was so tiny I was afraid I would break her. But she fit perfectly in my arms. Her eyes were closed but I could see movement behind them, and every once in awhile, a little smile would form on her lips. It was a beautiful thing to see. I guess it was true what others said, when you have a baby, the way you see things changes. And I was definitely seeing this in a whole new light.

“I want to see (Y/N). Can I take her with me?” I turned to the nurse and she nodded her head. Harry walked me out and took me to the room (Y/N) was in. He stood by the door and nodded towards me then left. I held on tight to my baby and walked in. (Y/N) was sleeping but I still sat down by her. She looked like she had just ran a marathon but she still looked beautiful as ever. I hated the fact that I broke her heart, but most of all, I wasn’t in the delivery room to witness any of this. The baby did a little cough and it scared me. I bounced her up and down and spoke little words to her.

Your POV

Even though I was peacefully sleeping, I could hear something in my room. It was a little cough. My little girl’s cough…..followed by a man’s voice whispering to her. And I knew that voice all too well. I opened my eyes and could see Zayn sitting there with our baby girl in his arms. I watched him for a little bit. His whole focus was on her. He looked at her as if he had never seen something more special. It was the first time I saw him smile since I last saw him. I could feel my eyes start to water at the sight of this. He was back…..

His head came back up to look at me and when he saw me, he smiled. “Hey (Y/N).”“Hi Zayn.” He looked back at the baby then to me. “She’s beautiful. Looks just like you and I.” I smiled at that. My voice broke as I spoke. “Yes, yes she does.” He rubbed her forehead and looked back at me. “(Y/N)……I don’t know how to say this, but I can’t express how regretfully sorry I am about all of this. Looking at her now, I can’t believe I even said that to you, and thank god you didn’t listen to me…..because then I would’ve never got to see her, and I already love her so much.” I could see his eyes start to water as well but he continued. “But (Y/N), I never stopped loving you, I just let you go because I thought all I would do is ruin you and this baby. But one look at her and you again and it’s like I need you back in my life. I want to be apart of her life as well as yours babe. I know I said hurtful things and if I could take them back I would, but please believe me when I say I’ll never do something like that again.” And he left it at that.

I sat there and watched him with her. Even though he hurt me, he was here now. And him being here showed me he did care. The baby coughed again and he hugged her closer. And that’s all I needed to see to know he really meant what he said. “I’m going to need you Zayn….” His head snapped up and reached out to grab my hand. “And I promise I will be here for you (Y/N), for both of you, always.” I smiled at him and he smiled back. He wiped away my tears and let out a laugh. “I love you so much (Y/N).”“I love you too Zayn.” “Now…..we need a name for her.” Out of nowhere Niall’s voice filled the room. “I vote Zoe! I already called it!” We both turned and could see all of the boys standing in the doorway. I laughed at Niall and looked at Zayn. “Niall loves that name so much, and I do too. But what do you think?” Zayn looked down at her and held her in front of him. “I think Zoe sounds perfect. Zoe Malik. I love it.” “Okay, Zoe it is.” Niall came in and clapped. The rest of them followed in and congratulated Zayn. 

I sat back and watched them all talk about Zoe and how much they missed each other. I was glad they were on talking terms again and grateful they were all here. Not only did Zoe have her 4 uncles in her life, but now she had her father, and I couldn’t of been more happy with this.

Your POV

Pain shot through me like nothing I’ve ever felt before. My eyes were squeezed shut and I held on for dear life to Harry’s hand. When the contraction was over I was breathing like i had just ran a marathon. I opened my eyes and could see Harry’s eyes watering. I didn’t know if it was from me squeezing his fingers off or for me. I felt bad and loosened my grip. “I’m sorry Haz.” He cracked a smile. “No it’s okay (Y/N). Squeeze all you need.” I chose Harry to come in the room with me because only one was allowed. I didn’t tell Zayn so I didn’t expect him to be here. But I’ve been going through this for about 14 hours and it was hell! I chose not to get all doped up on meds and wanted to have the baby naturally. But now I was fully regretting it. I thought when people said labor hurt they were just kidding, but this shit was no joke. 

Another contraction came and I held my breath. “Breathe (Y/N), remember what the doctor said.” Harry was shaking my hand to remind me. I let out my breath and started rapidly breathing. It did little to help, the only way this was ever going to get better was when this baby got out of me. I still wasn’t dilated enough so I had to endure pain while it got there. The doctor came in every hour to check on me. The last time he came in I was close. So I was hoping this next time he came in I would be ready. When I finally caught my breath, I spoke to Harry. “Harry, thank you so much for everything.” He rubbed my hair and laughed. “Of course babe, I just can’t wait to see this baby! I know you can do this (Y/N).” I laughed through my pain as another one came on. Just then the doctor came in and sat down to check again. 

“Okay Ms. (Y/L/N), let’s see if you’re ready now.” He had me put my legs up in the proper things and he checked. I looked down to see his reaction and he had a smile on his face. “Looks like we’re ready! Okay, just like we practiced (Y/N). Take a deep breath and push as hard as you can for as long as you can. Okay? You ready?” I squeezed Harry’s hand and looked at him. He smiled and nodded his head, giving my hand a gentle squeeze. I looked back at the doctor with a new found energy. “Yes.”“Let’s get started then. I’m going to count to 3 and then you’ll push. Remember to breath hun.” I nodded my head, eager to get through this and finally meet my baby. “Okay, 1…2….3!” I took a deep breath and pushed. It took all my energy just to do that. I stopped and took deep breaths. “Another time. 1…2….3!” And I did it again and again and again. It still hurt like hell but Harry was there rubbing my head and giving me encouraging words. “Almost there (Y/N).” I pushed one last time and I could feel the baby coming through. 

Then I heard a cry. I could see Harry’s eyes widened and smile spread across his face. I was so weak I couldn’t even move my head to see. But I could still hear the crying. “Well (Y/N), congratulations. You have yourself a new baby girl!” “Yes!” Harry did a hop and shouted. I could feel my head start to spin and my vision go dark. I was so tired now, all I wanted to do was sleep, but I needed to see my girl. I could feel Harry let go of my hand and heard cutting. The umbilical cord. Once that was done, I heard crying and some moving around. Then, just before I was going to pass out, Harry walked over with her. She was already wrapped in a blanket and cleaned. I tried my best to sit up but I just couldn’t. But I could still see her. And I started to cry, from both joy and sadness. She looked so much like Zayn. She had his nose, his hair color, but she had my eyes. And she was the perfect shade of tan. I felt myself smiling and then I closed my eyes.

Harry’s POV

I got scared when (Y/N) closed her eyes, but the doctor said she just needed to sleep. So I stood there with the little girl. (Y/N) never said the name yet, but I could tell by looking at her that she would go with Niall’s pick. The baby was so beautiful and I couldn’t help but hold onto her tightly. It was like it was instinct to protect her already. But I knew as I looked at (Y/N) giving birth, she had really wanted Zayn to be here. He should’ve been, but I was just glad I was here to help her. This truly was a beautiful thing to witness. I just couldn’t wait to tell the boys.

The nurses had to take the baby and run tests and finish cleaning her so I walked out and met the boys in the waiting room. They all stood up as I walked in and I just had a huge grin on my face. “Well?” Niall was anxious. I looked at all of them then eagerly said, “IT’S A GIRL!” They all jumped up and down, especially Niall, doing his famous jump. They all looked so happy. “Did she go with my name?” “I don’t know, (Y/N) passed out after giving birth. The doctor said she needed to sleep. But Niall I’m sure she will.” He nodded his head. “How was it Harry?” Louis looked excited to hear details, but really there was nothing to say besides it was beautiful. “She hurt my hands, but it was worth it. You guys get to see the baby in a little bit they said.” 

30 minutes passed and they came out to get us all. We walked down a hall and came to a huge window. Behind it were all the babies that had been born today. “There she is.” I pointed to the baby in the front row. All the boys leaned in and awed. “She looks so much like Zayn already….” It was Liam who said this. But it was true. She did. “Can we hold her?” Niall turned and asked a nurse. “Sure, but only one at a time in there.” “I call dibbs!” Niall hurried into the room and picked her up gently. He was smiling so big his face was turning red. I could see his eyes watering but he just continued to look at her. The same happened for all the boys. This was something we’d all been waiting for and she was finally here. I just wanted (Y/N) to wake up so she could enjoy this with us.

Before we left her, Niall went back in. He pulled out his phone and took a picture of her. I knew what he was going to do. He looked at us and we just nodded our heads. I guess Zayn deserved to see his baby. Niall sent the picture and we walked back to the waiting room. I went to check on (Y/N) but she was still sleeping. But I walked over to her bed and spoke to her. “(Y/N), wake up……you have a beautiful baby girl waiting for you!” I squeezed her hand and then left. And when I came back, there Zayn was, with the boys with a frantic look on his face.

Your POV

3 days later..

I ended up staying at a hotel and holed up in the room. I was deeply saddened by what had happened, but it was for the best. He hadn’t tried calling or anything. The only person to call was Harry. But I didn’t know if he should get involved in this, so I never answered. After laying in bed for so long, I knew I had to get up and go somewhere. I got dressed and put on some light makeup and left. I was hungry and thirsty so I stopped at a Starbucks and sat down. I had on a beanie and hoped my face was covered from anyone who would notice me, but it didn’t work. No sooner had I sat down with my order Harry walked in. He didn’t see me at first so I was trying to hide from him, but he walked to a table before me and saw me.

“(Y/N)?” I gave up and looked at him. I gave him a weak smile and said hi. His face looked worried as he walked to my table. “Hun where have you been?” I didn’t know if he knew what happened, so I lied. “I’ve been around..” He sat down and gave me a sarcastic look. “(Y/N)…Zayn told me, so don’t lie to me. Where have you been.” He was demanding now. My shoulders fell and I gave in. “I’ve been staying at a hotel here in town.” He shook his head. “Babe, you need to stay with someone. You can’t be by yourself. Especially after what happened.” “I know Harry, I just…don’t have anywhere to go.” “Yes you do. You have all of us. You know we all care about you. But since I’m the only one who knows right now, come stay with me.” I started to shake my head. “(Y/N) don’t argue with me. You’re staying with me and that’s that.”“But….I don’t want to get between you and Zayn.” He just shrugged his shoulder. “Fuck him. After he told me what happened I kicked him out. I haven’t talked to him since. So I really don’t care. I’ve been trying to reach you, why do you think I’ve been calling love.” “I just didn’t want you to be involved.” “Well, too late. I’m involving myself, so you’re living with me.” 

There was no way he was going to let this go so I agreed. “Thanks Harry..” He looked at me sympathetically. “I just can’t believe he did this to you.” I looked down. “You and I both.” “Well hey, I’m glad you’re pregnant. I can’t wait to be an Uncle!” I smiled at that. It was true, he would be a great uncle. “You’ll be great Harry don’t worry.”“Shoot, I know I will. But for real (Y/N)……you’re going to get through this okay. You don’t need Zayn when you have the rest of us okay?” I wanted to cry. He was so caring it was a shame he didn’t have a family of his own by now. “Thank you Harry. I guess the other boys will find out when I move in huh?” “Yeahh but it’s better they know, so it’s going to be okay. They’ll be happy too.” I hoped so, I didn’t want their relationship with Zayn to change because of me, especially Niall’s. But then again, I didn’t do anything, it was all Zayn.

3 months later..

I moved in with Harry and things were looking better for me. I went to my regular doctor’s appointments and took care of whatever I needed to do. Each time I went, a different boy went with me. I think they were more excited than I was for the baby. They all smiled each time we saw the baby on the screen. We didn’t know the sex yet, I didn’t want to find out. I wanted it to be a surprise. So the boys were making up the nursery for me and choosing neutral colors suitable for a boy or girl. It was funny because I could hear them in there yelling at each other each time they worked on it. Each one wanted to put their own style into it and they’d clash. But I told them to do whatever they wanted. 

But even though their happiness brought me joy, Zayn still hadn’t come around. The boys said they hadn’t heard from him and stopped talking to him. I could see Niall struggling with it but he would just tell me he was okay. I felt bad for him, it was hardest on him. Each time I told him to go talk to him he’d shake his head. ‘He chose this (Y/N), it’s for the best’ was all he’d say. I still had 6 months to go, so hopefully he came around eventually, not for me, but for the boys because I knew they missed him.

Zayn’s POV

6 months later..

As I was walking out around town, I’d see things that reminded me of (Y/N). Especially when I saw her picture in a magazine showing her baby bump, I’d stop and stare. The headlines said they thought it was Harry’s baby, but I knew it wasn’t. It was mine.……but I fucked up. It’s been almost 6 months and I hadn’t talked to any of them since then. I’m not going to lie, I missed the boys like hell, but I especially missed her. I was still in denial about the baby, but then again, it’s a baby. Something she and I made and brought into this world. How could I be foolish enough to tell her to get rid of it. I always thought about her, but I was too scared to call her. I was afraid she’d just hang up on me. But this was all my fault.

I’ve been alone ever since then and not handling myself well. I tried to stay holed up in my house with liquor so I wouldn’t run into anyone, but 9 months later, that was getting old. And seeing these pictures of her stomach growing was my only way of knowing she was okay. It seemed like she was. In each picture she was smiling and so were the boys. I wonder what it is. I wonder if she’ll let me know when she has it. Will she come back to me once it’s born. All these questions ran through my head even though I knew they shouldn’t. But I could only hope and pray things did change between us, but I knew they wouldn’t unless I apologized. But I just wasn’t ready yet.

Your POV

I was making dinner for the boys while they were watching tv. Since it was close to my due date, they’d all been hovering over me making sure I’m okay and ready to go. I laughed each time. They were the big brothers I never had and they were very protective. I wasn’t used to it, but I sure as hell liked it. I was being treated like a princess. I went in and sat with them to discuss baby names. “If it’s a girl I think you should name her Zoe. I like that name.” Niall was daydreaming already about this.“And if it’s a boy?” “Pssh, it’s going to be a girl don’t worry.” I laughed at him. “I think if it’s a boy you should name him Damen. It’s from your favorite tv show.” Louis was right, Damen from the vampire diaries was my favorite. “So is Jeremy.” Liam chimed in. “Jeez, you guys do sure know a lot about me. But that’s true, I do like the way Jeremy and Damen sound. I like Zoe too Niall.” “Thank you.” “Harry, what about you?”

He was thinking hard when I felt something. I looked down at my pants and saw they were wet and they just kept getting wetter. I gasped and held my stomach.“Guys……” They all stopped what they were doing and jumped up. “IT’S TIME!” Niall was jumping up and down. Liam and Harry pulled me up and held me up. “Oh my god.” “Quick, Louis get the car ready and Niall get the hospital bag for her.” They ran off in different directions as Liam and Harry put my shoes on and called the hospital. I couldn’t believe it. My baby was finally here! I was so excited now…but there was also a sadness because Zayn wouldn’t be able to be there. “Let’s go!” Louis yelled. The boys scrambled to get me in the car and to the hospital. “You ready for this (Y/N)?” I looked at them and smiled. “Ready as I’ll ever be.” And with that I was hauled off into the ER.

Your POV

I walked out of the doctor’s office with mixed feelings.. I was pregnant…....I was happy, but I didn’t know how Zayn would take it. I had forgotten to take my birth control a couple of times and hadn’t told him. We talked about having kids, but he always said not until later. We’ve only been together for a year..was that even enough time for us to have kids? I mean I was ready, but still…..there’s always that scariness to this. 

That was 5 days ago. I hadn’t told Zayn yet because I was waiting for the right moment. He was home now and we were just lounging around. But when he started to pull me towards the bedroom, I knew where this was going. I couldn’t do it though. I had to tell him before we went any further. “Zayn, stop.” He halted and dropped my hand. “What? Why?” I looked down at the ground and got quiet. He stepped closer to me and lifted my head up. “What’s wrong babe?” I grabbed his hand and led him back to the couch. I sat him down and I sat next to him. I held onto his hand the whole time and when he could feel me start to shake he grabbed it with both of his and rubbed my hand. “(Y/N), you’re scaring me.” 

I took a deep breath and told myself to remain calm. Maybe he’d take it well. I looked him in the eyes and smiled. And it finally came out. “I’m pregnant.” Right after I said that, my smile fell, because by Zayn’s reaction, it wasn’t a happy moment. His face fell, his hands loosened on mine and I could feel the heat radiating from his body, heat from anger. He just sat there, wide eyed, staring at me. I could feel sweat forming on my forehead and my hands start to shake again. He pulled his hands away from mine and rubbed his face. His hands were covering his face when he finally said something. “How?” “I um, I forgot to take my pills a couple of times.” His head snapped up and his fierce eyes pierced mine. “You forgot?! How hard is it to take some pills (Y/N)?” 

“Why are you so upset, I thought this would be a good thing…” But he just shook his head. “No, no it’s not. I can’t have a kid right now.” I could feel my heart fall to the pit of my stomach from hearing that. He didn’t want this kid……what was I going to do?“Zayn…..what are you saying then.” He got up and stood in front me, looking down. “Get rid of it. I can’t do this.” My mouth fell open and I couldn’t believe he had just said that. Abortion? Hell no. I would never do that. Ever. Instead of feeling sad again, I got angry. I stood up and got right in his face. “I would never do that to my child. I will fuckin leave if you really don’t want this.” But he didn’t budge. “Fine. Go.” And he left the house. 

I jumped when I heard the door slam. He really just walked out……..and he didn’t care if I left. My hand fell to my stomach and I finally broke down. I crumbled right there on the ground and let it all sink in. I was going to be raising a child by myself because of Zayn. It’s not like I planned this, it just happened. But I’m not mad that it did, he was the one who was mad. And I couldn’t understand how he could do that. He said he loved me and wanted to have kids with me, but when it happens it’s a totally different story. I just didn’t know. After hours of laying there, I finally got up and went to our room. I had moved in with him about 5 months ago and let my place go. As I was packing my things, I didn’t know where I was going to go. But I needed somewhere to go because I couldn’t be on the streets now, not while I’m pregnant. 

Zayn’s POV

My hands were shaking as I drove to Harry’s. I was speeding and running every stoplight I could just to get there. I needed to talk about this to someone. I couldn’t believe she was really pregnant. Sure I wanted to have kids, but no way in hell right now. I wouldn’t be able to do it. And I know asking for an abortion she would’ve said no, but it came out anyways. 

I finally got to Harry’s and jumped out of the car. I walked right in, not caring. He was sitting there in the living room watching tv by himself. He jumped when he saw me. “Zayn?” I pulled out a cigarette and just started pacing back and forth non stop. “Zayn man, what’s wrong?” I let out my smoke and finally looked at him. “(Y/N)’s pregnant.”Harry’s eyes lit up with joy, but that’s not how my reaction was. “Well that’s good mate congrats.” “No, no it’s not.” His smiled faded. “What? Why?” “I can’t have a kid right now Harry.” He got up and stood in front of me. “And why not? You love her right? She’s the one right? What’s so wrong with having a kid?” “I JUST FUCKIN CAN’T!!” He put his hands up in defeat. I was just tired and stressed now. I didn’t know how to get across that I didn’t want a kid right now. “I just….can’t.” I began pacing again and he just watched me. “What’d you say to her?” 

I stopped and remember her face when I said that. “I said to get rid of it.” Her face turned from hurt to anger. And that’s what Harry’s just did. “Abortion!? Zayn, really? You can’t be serious.” But I nodded my head. He just looked shocked. “Then she said no and I told her to leave.” I looked down, not being able to meet his judgmental eyes right now. “You what?” He walked right up to me and shoved me hard. I lost my cigarette and damn near fell. “What the fuck man!” “What is wrong with you Zayn? That is your girl, the one you supposedly love! How could you do that to her? Get the hell out of my house. I can’t even look at you right now.” Harry turned and walked away from me. I stood there though, shocked at him. He’s never been angry like that with me. But I guess I deserved it. I picked up my cigarette and just left. 

I wasn’t going to go home in case (Y/N) was still there, so I drove around. I drove until it was daylight once again and finally went home. As soon as I walked in, I noticed all her things were gone. And there was a note. 

‘I’m keeping the baby. You’re not welcome in my life anymore Zayn. I hope you’re happy.’

I crumpled the paper up and threw it at the wall. I was breathing heavily and started to feel dizzy. I walked up to my room and just fell on the bed. I was angry at her, but at the same time, hurt. What did I do?

Harry’s POV

It’s been 2 months and I’ve been depressed without her. When she said we couldn’t be friends, I knew that was it. I wouldn’t have her in my life anymore. And she was right. I chose fame over her. She was second to me and I shouldn’t of made her feel like that, ever. But now I was dealing with my consequences. But the lads didn’t like the way I was handling it. I was fighting every chance I got, I’d skip interviews for the group, and I’d just drink. I didn’t like the way I was handling it either, but I was beating myself up over a mistake I made. Of course management was mad at me again because of my actions, but when aren’t they mad at me? I broke up with (Y/N) just to make them happy and look where that got me. Nowhere. I still couldn’t believe I had done it, but I did, and I couldn’t take it back. Worse of all, she wouldn’t talk to me.

“Harry, you’ve got to stop acting like this….she wouldn’t want this.” I looked over to where Louis was. We were at my flat and I had a bottle of Jack in my hand yet again. But I couldn’t help it. It made my mind forget seeing the image of her crying. It was the only thing that numbed the pain. “She didn’t want any of this, but I did it anyways Lou.” “You can’t sit here and do this for the rest of your life. You’re just making it worse. Get some help Harry please. If not for you, for the rest of us. We’re worried about you mate.” I could feel myself start to break down again. All I’d been doing is crying. But only Lou would see it, I was too scared to let the others see me like this. “I just….don’t know what to do anymore. I miss her.” He got up and walked over to me. He took the bottle out of my hand and set it on the table. Then knelt down in front of me and made me face him. “Then do something about it Harry. Fuck management, screw them if they’re not happy. All that matters is that you’re happy mate. And I know by seeing you like this, this isn’t what happy is. You were happy when you were with her. Go get her mate.” I had thought about it before, but then the threat would come back to my mind…..but now I didn’t care. I’d rather have her than fame. I had to go win her back. “Okay, I will.”

Your POV

In the 2 months since I’d last seen Harry, I’d been keeping myself busy to forget. I got more classes, took on a second job and was hardly ever home. It built up a lot of stress for me, but it helped me cope. Anything was better than sitting at home wishing Harry was there. But he wasn’t, and wouldn’t be coming back, so I needed to move on. I was still in love with him, there was no denying that, it was just the fact of removing him from my thoughts. It still hurt, knowing I was his second choice, but it was better I knew about it. 

Niall and the rest of the boys would stay in touch with me, but I rarely responded because they just reminded me of what I had. I needed to get out of London, get away. Which is why I got another job so I could save up. And I finally had the money to go. So I was. Tonight I was leaving..all my stuff was already packed and ready to go. But as I stood in my empty apartment, I couldn’t help but know I’d miss it here. I’d miss even him because he’s what brought me here. Ugh, just another thing I’ll have to forget. I locked the door, gave the key back to my manager and left to the airport. And I just sat there, waiting for my flight to be called.

Harry’s POV

I ran over to (Y/N)’s apartment knowing she had moved. I kept track of her every move to let myself know she was safe. But when I got there and knocked on the door, there was no response. Finally after knocking so loud, one of her neighbors came out. “What are you doing lad?!” I frantically started speaking. “The girl…the girl that lives here, where is she?” “Well she just left, she’s moving.” “Moving, moving where?” “I’m not sure, but she’s already at the airport.” Shit. I took off running to my car. There was only one airport here so I knew I would find her. I just hoped when I did, she’d take me back.

Your POV

My flight was finally being called. I gathered up my carry on and started towards the line to hand in my ticket. I was casually standing there waiting when all of a sudden I could hear someone screaming my name. But not just anyone…...it was Harry. I turned around and saw him fighting with security to get past them. By now everyone was looking at me. But he kept screaming for me. Finally I got out of line and walked over to him. “What are you doing?!” I hissed at him. This was really embarrassing for me. When he finally answered, he was out of breath. “(Y/N),…..please listen to me…….you can’t get on that plane…” Oh really. “And why not?” “Because I love you and I made a terrible mistake. I miss you and need you in my life……so please…..please don’t go.” The security officer could see where this was going and finally let go of Harry and left us alone. But I was too shocked to say anything. Did he really mean it? He wouldn’t of come all the way down here just to make a fool of himself for nothing. He could see the skepticism in my eyes. “(Y/N), believe me when I say this. I regret what I did. You’re right, I chose fame over you. But now I see that I don’t care for it, I don’t want it……,all I want is you in my life, by my side, making me happy. So please, don’t go.” I could feel my heart racing and my tears falling. Was he serious? “Harry Styles you better not be messing around with me.” He got down on his knees and held onto my hands. “I swear to you I’m not.” As I looked into his eyes, I could see his true meaning.

He really did want me back. “But what about your career.” “I don’t care about it, I’m not happy with it every since you left. I need you in my life to make it complete. I’m nothing without you. Please….” I squeezed his hands and pulled him up from the ground. I looked him in the eyes and took a deep breath. “Okay..” His eyes lit up and he smiled. “Are you serious? You’ll stay with me?” “Yes Styles.” “Oh thank you so much!” He picked me up and spun me around, holding me tightly. I hugged him back and nuzzled my head in the crook of his neck. I missed this and I missed the smell of him. I knew I chose the right answer and I knew I wouldn’t regret it. I loved him and nothing was going to keep me from him.

Your POV

I arrived at Niall’s and just fell into his arms. He couldn’t understand a word I was saying because I was crying so much. He picked me up and took me to his room. “(Y/N), calm down and tell me what happened.” He held my head so I was looking at him and breathed with me. I took deep breaths and counted to 10. This always helped me when I cried. But I hadn’t cried like this in so long. “It’s okay babe, just calm down.” He was still holding onto me. My breathing settled and I was finally able to talk. “Harry broke up with me.” Niall’s hands fell to my shoulders and squeezed them. “I’m so sorry (Y/N).”“Management told him to. And he listened this time….am I that bad Niall?” “(Y/N), hell no. You know they’d use any excuse to get him to break up with you. You’ve done nothing wrong. Don’t talk like that.” “Then why would he?” “I really don’t know babe. Lay down, get some sleep. We’ll talk about this in the morning k.” I nodded my head and got under his covers. He walked out of the room and left me to be alone. But I couldn’t sleep. I just couldn’t figure out Harry and it was pissing me off.

Harry’s POV

As I stared at the bottle of Jack I had in my hand, I couldn’t help but hope what I did was for the right thing. As another shot went down my throat, my doorbell rang. I got up to answer it, thinking it’d be (Y/N), but instead it was Nialler. “Come in.” I sat back down in my chair and drank more. Niall closed the door and slowly walked in and sat on the couch. “Harry…..whatcha doin mate?” I held up the bottle and smiled. “Want some?”“No thanks.” I shrugged and drank more. “Just drinking to rid of some things.” Niall looked down. “Yeahh about that…what happened Harry?” He must’ve heard or else he wouldn’t be over here. “Did (Y/N) tell you?” He just nodded his head. “But I want to hear it from you.” “We broke up.” He had a sarcastic look on his face. “Yeahh I know that, but why.” I stared at the bottle again. “Because I needed to.” “Why? Because management said so? Harry how many time before had they told you and you denied them. Why now? Why do this to not only (Y/N) but to yourself?” He was right, I not only hurt her, but also myself in the process. “It was the right thing to do.” I could see him shaking his head out of the corner of my eyes.

“No Harry. This isn’t you. There’s a broken and crying girl at my house right now because you chose to listen to some people who don’t know you. They don’t know the love you guys have. They don’t know anything about your happiness. They just think this’ll help with fans, but it won’t Harry. True fans will love you no matter who you’re with. (Y/N) didn’t do anything.” “There have been less fans asking me for things since I got with her though.” “Only because they respect your time with her Harry. Did you ever think of that? Maybe they didn’t want to bug you while out with her. Stop blaming other things. Look inside your heart and see that you really didn’t want to do this.” 

I did, but I already made the choice and I had to stick by it. Because I knew if I told management no again, they’d do something horrible to me, and I didn’t want that. It was safer for her to be out of this relationship. “I’m doing this for her Niall.” “No, you’re doing it to make others happy. What about your happiness mate? You love her don’t you? Why can’t you be happy?” He was right…….I had to call management. “You’re right, I’m gonna call management and tell them I can’t do this.” “There you go mate. Come by my house in the morning then.” And he left. I grabbed my phone getting ready to call management but instead they were calling me. I picked up immediately to tell them.“Guys, I…” “Job well done Harry. Fans are rising and more demand for tickets also. I told you this would help.” “But that’s what I wanted to talk to you about, I changed my mind. I’m not going to do this.” They were silent and I thought they hung up, but they finally spoke. “Listen to me Harry Styles, if you get back with her, I will guarantee you fired from the music industry. No more fame, no more One Direction. Now do you want to do that to your bandmates?” “Well no….but…” “But nothing. Keep things the way they are and we’ll have no problems.” I was just stunned. They were threatening me, threatening to take away something I loved to do. But on the other hand, I would lose someone I love…..I didn’t know what to do anymore.

Your POV

The next morning I woke up and Niall was already gone. He left a note saying he had to go to the store and he’d be back. I took a shower and got ready for the day. I was planning on going over to Harry’s to get my things, but when I heard a knock on the door, I didn’t expect to see him there. “Harry?” He looked at me and smiled. “May I come in?” All I could do was nod my head. I was still hurting from the night before, but I didn’t want him to see how broken I was. He walked in and went straight to the living room and sat down. I walked after him and sat down next to him. We sat in silence for some time before he finally spoke. “(Y/N), I just want to tell you, I love you. I really do. But believe me when I say……..I did this for you….” “No you didn’t. We both know that Harry. You did it for yourself. And it’s okay, because I’ve come to realize I will never be someone’s first, I’ll always be second. It’s always been like that, so you’re no different.” “No babe, c’mon. That’s not what I want you to think. You are my first, you are. But we just can’t be together….” I looked down at my hands. I could feel my eyes start to water. All my life, everyone’s shunned me and put me down. Always told me I’d never be good enough for someone, and I was just now realizing they were true.

And it hurt. In the two years I was with Harry, his career always came first. Which I was okay with until now….now it just seemed so rude and mean. And I didn’t want that anymore. “But (Y/N), promise me something.” He made me look back up at him. “Please be my friend, let’s keep some type of relationship.” I could myself start to shake my head.“No Harry…” his face fell, “I can’t be friends with someone I’m in love with…..” He looked hurt, but I couldn’t torture myself with his presence if I can’t have him. “But..” “No Harry, I can’t. If I can’t have you as my boyfriend, I don’t want you as a friend, that’ll make things more complicated for me, and if you really don’t want me, I need to forget about you….” I could see his eyes watering. But he didn’t say anything more. One hand rubbed down his face as he looked at the ground. Without another look, he got up and walked out.

Once again I broke down. He was going to be out of my life for good. But this was for the best…..I hope so.

--

note: this is written by a girl named Ashley :)

check out her blog on tumblr!

you take one last look in the mirror and then run down the stairs , your boyfriend niall sits on the couch , playing with his phone ” bye ” you shout ” hey wait !” he shouts back ” what ? niall i have to go , im going to meet my friends in town and im already late ” you say and look nervous on your watch

” what ? youre leaving again ? but babe , youre out tonight too  ” niall whines ” yeah niall i know but i want to meet my friends now ok ? bye ” you say ” abby i dont want you to go , look at you !! are you cheating on me ?!” he asks ” are you serious ? what do you want to say with that ?!” you snap ” that you look like a bitch ?!” he snaps back ” okay niall fine ” you say 

” im tired of you being away all the time ” he shouts ” said the boy who called his girlfriend a bitch ” you say and roll your eyes ” im just missing you ! WHY CANT YOU UNDERSTAND THAT ?!” he yells 

” its okay if you call me a bitch , fine .  but you dont yell at me ! dont be a pussy niall , you would go yout too if you would have friends but obviously you dont ” you hiss and leave him there speachless

you run over to your car and start driving , you pull out your phone and call your friend ” hey im sorry i cant come , i had a big fight with niall ” you say and hold back sobs ” oh shit why ?” she asks ” because im not with him very often but i cant tell him about the party i mean i want to surprise him and now everything got out of controll and we faught , i feel so guilty ” you say 

” aww babe dont be sad , go home and talk to him ” she replies ” but it should be a surprise ” you sigh ” it doesnt matter ” she says ” yeah fine , i hope we can work this out ” you answer and hung up , you pull the car around and drive back to your and nialls apartment .

” babe ??” you shout and run into the living room . niall sits on the ground and cries ” abby ? i-i-i-i-im soo sorry , i just missed you so bad ” he cries ” shhh its my fault , the reason why i was out all the time is , because i planed a brithday surprise party for you , i would never cheat and im sorry for what i said to you ” you coo and wrap your arms around his waist 

” im sorry too , you dont look like a bitch its just , you are such a pretty girl i dont know , im scared sometimes that you find someone better , who deserves you ” he sighs 

” aww niall , never , youre my one and only im never going to leave you , i dont deserve you , and now shut up and let us forget this stupid fight ” you murmur and kiss him loving ………..

writen by Lena on tumblr. You should really check her blog out. She's amazing ( ni borde titta på hennes blogg, hon är en underbar människa och väldigt bra på att skriva )

A/N:i hope you enjoy it :) i love perrie and little mix and i dont try to be mean and im a zerrie shipper

harry and niall are over tonight and youre upstairs to give them some privacy . but after a while you decide to be a good girlfriend and make them some snacks so you walk down the stairs but stop as you hear your boyfriend zayns voice say your name “i-i dont know lads if i love sam , with perri there was something special , she dont cares about what people say and is so natural unlike sam and i think i should break up with her ” he spit out and you gasp a little bit harry noticed you but you show him not to say something . you run back in your shared bedroom take a huge bag and throw in clothes . you cry inside of you but on the outside you look hard and calm . you rub your temples and then walk down the stairs in the livingroom where the boys watch a movie .”bye”you only say and walk to the door “hey stop sam ??! where are you going ???” zayn ask you innocent “away from you . we are done “you say coldly “why , whats wrong ??” he ask run over to you and take your hand  but slap his hand away “hm let me think …. its because im not perrie , im sorry that i cry when i get death threats and dont say uhhhh i dont care or when your fans push me and call me rude names , and im sorry that im not as NATURAL as perrie sorry but this is the best joke ever her naturallity is = zero . and now dont touch me . “you hiss and walk trough the door leaving him speechless  . youre about to open your car door but he stopps you “you cant leave me sam “he hiss his eyes full of anger “why ??? youre not my boyfriend you cant tell me what i can and what i cant do so get out of my way or i fucking drive over you understood  ? piss off . “you hiss back and try to get into your car but he push you hard and you fall on the ground  ” what the fuck ??are you silly ???? what the hell is wrong with you dont speak with me ever again asshole “you yell get into your car and drive away with tears streaming down your face . you decide to drive to the flat from harry lou and liam . harry is probaply at zayns flat to calm him down . you get out of the car and run inside and to the elevator at press the floor 7 button . you knock and liam opes the door and give you a tight hug “what happed ???”he asks ” can i come in ??”you ask he quickly nodd and you two go to the livingroom where louis sits on the couch “oh hey sa- wait what has this asshole done ???” he asks you sit down and look at the ground “well niall and harry are in our , sorry in his flat and i was upstairs in my room because i wanted to give them some privacy but then i decided to make them some snacks and as i walk downstairs i heard zayn say how much he miss perri and that she dont care what people say about her and that shes more natural than me a-a-a-a-and then he said that he want to break up with me and go back to perrie “you sniffle 

2 weeks later 

Zayn tryed to call you countless times but you never answered . today youre alone at harrys lous and liams flat and watch tv the boys  went to the shop to buy some  food and stuff . so you sit alone on the couch . since the fight with zayn your an wreck you missed him so bad . suddenly you hear a knock on the door , you sigh and go to answer it . in the doorway stands a snobbing and shaking zayn . “please can i come in ?????” he ask and look at you with puppy eyes . you groan but let him in .”what ??? i told you not to speak with  me again “you say coldly but in your inside you want to forgive him “i-i-i cant live without you sam , in this  fucking  2 weeks i noticed how much i love and need you , and you were right , you are my one and only please take me back “he said and look at his feet “i-i dont know zayn “you mumble not wanting to make it so easy for him “you pushed me really hard zayn ” you say “i know and you dont know how sorry i’m for this . i cant sleep or eat everything remind me of you . i know you hate me now but i cant do something else as say how sorry i am and how much i love you ” he say and looks down ” i love you too zayn “you wisper 

Harry’s POV

I walked out of that office infuriated. As I got into my car, I went over everything that had just been discussed. Management told me for the 5th time, to break up with (Y/N). Each time they did this, I got more mad. I never understood why they thought me breaking up with (Y/N) would make anything better. Supposedly being with her was ruining my career, but I didn’t see any of that. They just didn’t want me to be with anyone for the fans’ sakes. I got home and Liam was there. Good, I wanted to talk about this with someone.

“Hey mate, what’s up? Why you look so mad?” I sat down across from him and just started talking. “Management. Again. They want me to break up with (Y/N), and I keep saying no so I don’t know why they keep asking me to.” Liam had already known about all the other times when they asked and he felt the same way I did, I didn’t need to. “It’s doing nothing to your career mate. They just think it’s best for the fans, but don’t listen to them. It’s what you and (Y/N) want. Have you talked to her about this?” “Yeahh, she knows about all the other times, she doesn’t know they just called me in again for this though.” “Harry, if there’s one thing I know, it’s that (Y/N) loves you very much. You guys have made it 2 years, you guys can make it through this.” And with that he left. He was right. We’ve been through some tough shit, but we got through it, together. I wasn’t about to let this get to me.

The next day at work, they called me in again. And told me the same thing. I blew up at them. “I’m not fuckin going to break up with her! What don’t you get?!?” I sat back down and could see them getting irritated. “Harry, we understand. But look at this,” they pulled out the iPad and showed me some pictures of (Y/N), “look at how she acts Harry. You can’t have someone like this ruining your reputation.” I looked at the pictures. There (Y/N) was, dancing with a boy I knew, but in a dirty way. But I knew he was gay, I didn’t care. And the other ones were of her partying with her friends and drinking. How was that bad? In every picture of Eleanor she had a fuckin drink in her hand. How was this any different. “Just listen to us Harry, we know what we’re talking about.” He slid over the iPad to me and I walked out. 

I went home and looked at the rest of the pictures and twitter. A lot of people were saying (Y/N) was a gold digger, she was a slut, she partied too much and that she wasn’t good for me overall. But they weren’t in my position, I didn’t see all that stuff. Sure she partied a lot, but she handled herself well. And most of her guy friends were gay, so I had no problem. But as I sat there and thought about it, I had lost a lot of followers since I started dating her, not a lot of people asked for my autograph anymore, no more pictures……..I now understood what management meant. But could I do this?

Just then (Y/N) walked in from grocery shopping. I looked at her and smiled. “Hey babe.” She came over and kissed my forehead. I loved when she did that, she was the only one ever to do so. “Hey love.” She could see I was stressed so she sat on my lap and hugged me. “What’s wrong Harry Styles?” Should I do this? Could I do this? I pulled her out of my arms and looked at her. “Babe, we need to talk.” She looked unhappy about it, but got off my lap and sat down and the couch in front of me. “Okay. About what?” I looked down at the floor because I knew I wasn’t going to be able to say this to her face to face. “I feel like we should……..break up………take a break…..from us.” 

Your POV

I sat there, wide eyed, heart racing listening to what he was saying. But I didn’t want to believe it. “No. Did management tell you to do this?!” He wouldn’t look at me so I knew it. “Harry, you know you don’t want to do this….” But he still wouldn’t look at me. My heart broke in that instant. 2 whole years spent together, only for him to listen to management and do this? My whole world came crashing down. If he so easily listened to them, then he didn’t really care. “Fine, I’m not going to sit here and fight for something you don’t want.” I got up walk away but he grabbed my arm. “Please (Y/N), you have to understand…” “No I get it Harry. Your fame means more to you than I do. Bye.” I grabbed my purse and walked out. I got in my car and drove as fast as I could to Niall’s. I needed to talk to someone right now because I didn’t deserve this. He just said it as if he didn’t care, and that’s what broke my heart. Harry Styles no longer wanted me in his life, and I never thought I’d say that. 

Niall’s POV

I sat here for 3 days, waiting, hoping she’d come back……but she never did. I was heartbroken. I didn’t deserve this, but I wanted her back. I found out she had gone to Harry’s, but he said something that made her feel alone. She was out there and felt alone. But here I was, surrounded by my friends, and I’ve never felt so alone like I do now. Everyone was trying to cheer me up because my birthday was coming, but it wasn’t working. The only thing that would help is me seeing her face. Just as I went to get up and go to the kitchen, I saw my door open and her figure stepped through. She froze when she saw me but I walked right up to her. “(Y/N), I’m so glad you’re here.” She looked around me and saw that everyone else was here too. I could see her start to back away but I grabbed her hand. “No, please stay. Stay and talk to me.”

Your POV

Niall’s touch just made everything worse. I came here to gather my things, but I didn’t expect to see him and everyone else. They were all watching us by now and I could feel my face heating up. I looked back into Niall’s eyes and just stood there. He was telling me to talk to him, but should I? I remembered what Harry said, I need to let him know. I can do this. “Ok. Let’s go upstairs.” He happily set his drink down and pulled me towards the bedroom. Once we were in, he locked the door and sat down by me. I looked at him and noticed his face was slimmer. He had lost weight. I looked down in embarrassment because I was the cause of this. I hadn’t expected him to care so much. He had not stopped calling since I left and it tore me apart to see his name show up. 

“(Y/N), please babe. We can talk about this. You don’t need to leave me.” My eyes met his and the blue in his eyes told me to be strong about this. I took a deep breath and started. “Niall…..I can’t do a lot of things for you and yet you do a lot of things for me, and I don’t deserve it. I don’t deserve any of this. You deserve someone who can bring you more happiness than I can. I’m just a normal girl, find someone who has a fun life and can buy you things.” He looked hurt after I stopped talking. He took a moment to compose himself then began. “I don’t think you understand how happy you do make me. I don’t give a shit about you buying me things. I don’t expect anything in return when I buy you stuff. I buy you things because I want to, no one is making me (Y/N). It’s just a token of my love for you. I don’t need someone else to make me happy, you are that person who makes me happy. I wish you wouldn’t think like that babe…” “Yeahh but I can’t even buy you what you want for your birthday Niall, do you know how much that hurts me? It hurts a lot. To know that you’re a low life who can’t even surprise your boyfriend on his birthday just sucks Niall. I don’t fit into your lifestyle. I don’t know why you like me in the first place.” “Why do you think like that (Y/N)?” “Because, it’s happened in the past.” I looked down at my hands and started playing with them. Then Niall’s hand held onto mine and he made me look at him. “Tell me.” I could feel my eyes start to water, my throat close up, because I had never told anyone this except Harry. And even then it was so hard for me to tell him. But I needed to do this. My voice was shaky, but I got it out. “My ex use to abuse me…..because I wouldn’t buy him things in return for him buying me things. He always expected more from me, always wanted something. I had no money, so I would get hit alot. He made me feel so low, but I finally got away. Harry helped me. And then that’s when I met you…I liked you instantly but didn’t expect anything from you……but when you asked me out…I was just shocked. I didn’t understand what you saw in me, but it scared me. But still, I went out with you.” 

I looked into his eyes as I said this. “And I ended up falling for you. But deep down I knew I wouldn’t be able to satisfy you. Shopping for your birthday just proved it to me..”By now my tears were falling and Niall just sat there watching me break down. He didn’t say anything for awhile. I could see anger written on his face, along with sympathy and sadness. “I didn’t tell you that to make you feel bad for me, I just wanted you to understand. I don’t deserve you Niall…” He shook his head and pulled me into his chest. “I wish you would’ve told me (Y/N).” “You and I both know you’re not one to talk about feelings.” He held me at arms length to look at me. “I know now that was my biggest mistake. If I could go back and tell you how I feel, none of this would’ve happened. But (Y/N), I love you as well..I just didn’t realize it until you were gone. I wasn’t happy at all, I felt alone. But babe, you can’t let something like this ruin your future relationships, especially ours. Know that I would never do that to you, never. I don’t deserve you because you’re much stronger than I am, you have a better heart than I do. But I know that you make me happy being with me, not leaving me. Leaving me would just make everything worse, because I need you in my life (Y/N). So please, reconsider what you said and come back home. I miss you. I don’t care if you buy me a birthday present or not, or any present in that matter, I don’t give a shit. Just be with me and make me happy by being my girlfriend who I love very much.” 

He was speaking from his heart, I could tell. He watched my every reaction to the words he was saying. And in honesty, he shocked me. He never expressed his feelings, and the one time he does, he confesses his love for me. And deep inside, I was jumping with joy. Niall said he loved me and I hadn’t even said it first. All I said was I had fallen for him and he knew what I was saying. I loved this boy with all my heart. But still felt bad. “I love you too Niall, but…” “But nothing. No, don’t think like that. Stop putting yourself down, you can’t do that babe. Move on from the past. You are not a low life, you’re the one person I know who is rich in life because of your personality. So stop it, if not for me, then for you.” He’s right, I needed to let go. All I could do was hug him and cry more. “I take this as a yes we’re back together?” I nodded my head into his shoulder and he wrapped his arms tighter around me. It felt good being in his arms again, and Niall was the only one who could make me feel this way. “I love you Niall.” “I love you (Y/N).” 

Doft från One Direction

Niall’s POV

“She what?!” Harry hesitantly looked down as he repeated what he just said. “She felt bad because she couldn’t buy you something and felt you deserved someone who could fit into your lifestyle easier…” I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. (Y/N) broke up with me because she couldn’t buy me something? No, that doesn’t happen. “Where is she? I need to see her. Tell her that it’s okay.” “I tried Niall, she won’t listen. And I don’t know where she is. I called you first.” I was pacing back and forth, on my phone, constantly calling (Y/N) but of course she wouldn’t pick up. Ok, think Niall. “Well she didn’t take any of her things with her when she left, so eventually she has to come back right? So I’ll just wait here until she comes back.” Harry just nodded his head and agreed with me. But inside I was just hoping she’d come back. If not, I’d just have to go out and hunt her down. Because this was a bullshit reason to break up. I know I never really expressed my true feelings to her, but I did really like her. I wanted her in my life. And she needed to know that. Money or not, I didn’t give a shit.

Your POV

I ended up driving to Harry’s and just sitting outside of his flat. He wasn’t home so I figured I’d wait for him. Niall was constantly calling me though. Each time I looked at his name showing up, my heart broke. But inside I had to tell myself I did the right thing. Liam has Danielle. Danielle was a dancer and therefore had money. Louis has Eleanor. Eleanor was a floor model, she had money. Zayn has Perrie. Perrie is a singer, she has money also. And here I was, struggling with my payments on things. My life just sucked. That’s why I couldn’t understand why Niall was with me. From the beginning I never thought this was going to work out, and now I knew for sure it wouldn’t. 

I sent Harry a text, not wanting to talk on the phone just yet. ‘I’m at your house, come home.xx’ He quickly responded and said he was on his way. So as I sat there, I thought about Niall. This was for his own good. He needs someone better. Even though I fell in love with him, love was all I had to give to him, and I was scared he wouldn’t accept that. Niall wasn’t really one to express feelings, we never talked about a future together. Just took everything day by day. I liked our relationship, but money wise, it was just horrible. And I know it’s stupid to base my relationship off of money, but being with someone as famous as him, it caught up to you.

Harry pulled up and I jumped out of the car. I ran over to him and just hugged him. I needed his hug right now to feel better about myself. “What happened (Y/N)? I was over at Niall’s.” “You were? What’d he say?” “Well he asked me if I knew why….and I told him.” I wasn’t mad at Harry for doing that, no, it was more of relief because now I wouldn’t have to be the one to explain it to Niall. “Come on, let’s go inside.” He held onto me and walked me inside. I sat on his couch as he prepared tea for us. He handed me mine and I took a sip. The warmth of it instantly helped ease my nerves. “He’s mad (Y/N), hurt…” I looked down, too ashamed to look at Harry. “But it’s what I needed to do.” “Needed? No, not needed. It’s what you thought would help, but it isn’t going to.”“But how am I suppose to make him happy when I can’t even provide for him?” “(Y/N), not every relationship is going to be like your last one. When will you see that Niall is different. He buys you things, so what. That does not mean you need to buy him something in return. He does it because he wants to.” 

Right…my last relationship. The guy I was with always bought me things like Niall did, but he’d call me a gold digger when I didn’t even ask for the things. In return he’d make me buy him things even when I was really broke, because if I didn’t, he would hit me. I guess this is why I was like this with Niall. I never liked him buying me things because I knew I couldn’t return the favor. “I know Harry, I just…” “Just what? (Y/N) that’s my friend. And he’s over there worrying about you, wondering why you’re doing this. You love him, tell him you love him, go to him and work this out between the two of you. Don’t just run away from it.” His words stung me, but he was being true. That is his friend, which is why I shouldn’t of come here. Harry’s my friend too, but Niall came first. And even though it hurt to say that, it was true. “You’re right, I’m sorry Harry.” I got up to leave and he grabbed my arm. “What are you…” I turned around and sarcastically answered him. “I’m your friend too Harry, and I’m hurting too, but I can see who you care more about. I shouldn’t of come here.” I grabbed my purse and left. 

I needed to be alone. I needed to get away from the people who made me think of Niall. But as I drove to my parents’ house, all I could think about was what Harry said. It’s true, I should’ve just told Niall about my struggles, my past relationship, my love for him. But I was just too scared. Scared he’d reject me and send me on my way. And at this point, I just didn’t know what to do now.

Your POV

Niall’s birthday was around the corner and I had no idea what I was going to get him. His lifestyle didn’t match mine. He was a millionaire, I was just a tutor after school making very little money. I never understood why he went for me, but he did. And we’ve only been together for a few months. And this was my first birthday with him. It was in a month. I knew I had to start saving up if I was going to get him something, but that meant more time away from him just so I could make the money. It was very stressful to be honest. 

I had asked Harry to go shopping with me to help pick out something for him. I told Harry to take me to Niall’s favorite store. It just so happened his favorite store was very expensive. Once I stepped in I knew I wouldn’t be able to afford any of these things. In the store they had everything from toys to clothes to tvs and video games. I looked at Harry and gave him a fake smile. I couldn’t let him know my insecurity about this. “So, what did Niall say he wanted from here?” I let him lead the way towards the back where men’s clothing and cologne was. “I know he really wants this.” Harry picked up a designer cologne and showed it to me. The bottle was a nice size and smelled really good. I could picture Niall smelling like this. “Well this smells good. How much is it?” “Um, $340.” My heart dropped. I didn’t have that kind of money…..”Okay well I’ll keep that in mind, what else?” He walked over to the clothes and showed me an outfit Niall had tried on and liked. It was a pair of nice black jeans, and a plain white shirt. It was nice, but who fuckin knew a plain white shirt cost $100? And the pants alone were $250. 

I could feel my anxiety starting to perk up. This was getting to me. I wasn’t going to be able to buy him anything he wanted and that’s what tore me apart. He was able to buy me all kinds of things and I couldn’t even buy him one thing he wants. “You like it?” Harry asked me but I just stood there staring at the outfit. I finally looked to Harry and just shook my head. I needed to get out of here….fast. I turned around and just took off running. I could hear Harry yelling for me but I never stopped. 

Niall’s life wasn’t made for me. I didn’t fit in with it. I wasn’t right for this. He deserved someone who could buy him these things. That just wasn’t me. I ran all the way back to Harry’s car and just leaned against the door. My breathing was heavy and I could feel my tears start to fall. I was finally breaking down about something I had been fighting for months. I knew getting with Niall was going to be hard, but he insisted it wouldn’t. He didn’t know that even though I didn’t give into the fans, other things would harm our relationship. Things like this. I just can’t do this.

Harry finally made it to me and pulled me into a hug. “What’s wrong love?” I was just sobbing into his chest. I didn’t want to talk about it here so I made him take me home. As soon as we got in he walked me over to the couch and made me sit down. I knew Harry before One Direction. He’s the one who introduced me to Niall. So talking to him was going to be easy. “Now, what happened back there?” By now my tears had stopped falling and my breathing was normal. “Well Harry, you know I’m just a normal girl. I work as a tutor when I have time and barely make enough money for myself. Niall has all this money and buys me things that I don’t even need, but he still gets them. And don’t get me wrong, I love his gifts. It just hurts me knowing I can’t do the same for him. His birthday is coming up and I can’t even buy him one thing that he wants. And it hurts Harry, it hurts because he’s my boyfriend and his girlfriend cant even get him anything. I don’t deserve him, I don’t fit into his lifestyle, he needs someone who can return his favors.” “(Y/N), Niall doesn’t care about designer things and presents. I’m sure he’ll be happy with whatever you give him, even if it’s just a box of twinkies. He doesn’t care. He really likes you, I’m sure he doesn’t expect anything in return from you babe.” “Yeahh but I should be able to do things for him. You don’t understand, you’re not in my position. You have money just like him, you can get anything you want. I can’t. I don’t think I can do this anymore, I can’t keep lying to myself telling myself everything will work out between us. I love him but I can’t do anything for him.” Harry shook his head at me. I knew what I was saying was selfish, but it was true. “Don’t say that, if you love him, your love for him is enough. Gifts or not, all he needs to know is that you love him. I’ll even buy the gift for you and say its from you okay.” “No, that would just hurt my pride, I can’t let you do that Harry. I can’t do anything about this, only one thing.” “And what is that?” 

I was about to answer him when Niall walked in. He looked happy until he saw me. I knew my face was red from crying and my eyes puffy. I was a mess. I looked at Harry and nodded towards him. He understood and left. Niall walked into the living room and sat by me. “Babe what’s wrong?” This is it, I can do this. Do it for Niall. “Niall, we need to talk.” I could see his body tense up and his eyes widen. “About what?” I had to keep telling myself not to break down as I did this, he didn’t need to see that. Me crying always made him even more sad. “I um, Niall I really like you, I do. But……I just don’t think this is going to work out for me…..” I had never told Niall that I love him, only Harry knew that. I was too scared to tell Niall. But after I said that, his face fell. He opened his mouth and then closed it, opened it again but nothing came out. I took this as a sign and just got up. “I’m sorry.” I ran out the door and to my car, just leaving him there. I didn’t know how he felt, I didn’t know if he cared why I just did that, I just needed to get out of here before I changed my mind.

Niall’s POV

(Y/N) just broke up with me. And I had no words to say. I was stunned, shocked. I thought everything was going good for us. Why would she do this? She just took off and left, leaving me here wondering. I was hurt, sad, angry. Did I do something wrong to her? I couldn’t think of anything, nothing. So why? I should of gone after her, but my body was just frozen here. But then I heard my phone ringing. I rushed to get it thinking it’d be (Y/N), but instead it was Harry. I didn’t want to answer, but I needed someone to tell. “Harry……(Y/N) just broke up with me…” All I heard on the other line was silence. After awhile, he finally answered. “I’m sorry mate.” Wait…Harry and (Y/N) were best friends, he must’ve known. “Do you know why?” My voice was demanding but I didn’t care, I needed to know why. Harry paused but answered. “Yes…” “Get over here now and tell me.” I hung up with Harry and waited for him to come over. I swear if this was over fans I was going to go crazy, but when Harry finally showed up, it was not what I expected.

Your POV

After Liam, me and Jake decided to leave. It kind of killed Jake’s buzz and mine too. We went back to my place and after 2 months of being with Jake, I decided it was finally okay for him to spend the night. He was happy because he was always trying to stay. He went home to get his clothes, so while I waited for him, I just sat there, thinking about Liam. Seeing him, I immediately became sober. He read the letter, and wanted to do what I said. But now, I didn’t want that. Because I knew if I had closure, I’d never hear from Liam again, and I didn’t want that. I know I’m with Jake, but seeing Liam tonight made everything clear to me. I never truly got over him. You can’t just forget about someone you were with for 3 years. I was going to marry that boy, but he chose to do this to me. So why was I thinking about him. 

Jake came back in his sweats and a t-shirt, ready to just chill out. To get my mind off of Liam, I figured I was going to do something I hadn’t done since Liam left for tour, have sex. With Jake though. I knew it was wrong to do this to get my mind off of Liam, but I knew Jake would like it, and he wouldn’t have to know the reason why. We were sitting on the couch watching tv when I got up and started pulling him towards my bed. “What are you doing?” He had a smile on his face.“Something for your celebration.” I was smiling, but deep down needing to do this and get it over with. “Well, lucky me.” 

His POV

I was very drunk, I knew that. After I saw (Y/N) and her boyfriend leaving the club, I followed them. I was driving under the influence but I wasn’t thinking right. They drove to a house, a house I assumed was hers now. I parked across the street and watched them go in. He left and I figured he wouldn’t be coming back. So I got out. After stumbling across the street, I walked around her house, checking it out. Her curtains were drawn, but I could see through them. There she was, sitting on her couch, just staring at the ground. What was she thinking about? Just then, I saw headlights in her driveway and I hid. I peeked my head around the corner and could see that he had come back. Fuck. I stayed in the dark until I heard her front door close. I came around to the front and watched them. They were just watching tv, but then she got up. And she was pulling him with her. I knew that look on her face because she would do that to me. In that moment, my drunkenness was gone, because I knew now what they were going to do. They were going to have sex. I couldn’t allow that to happen. I loved her too much to let her do this. After I saw them disappear upstairs, I ran up to her door and just started pounding on it.

Your POV

Just as I was going to take off my clothes, I heard a loud banging on my door. “What the fuck.” Jake was irritated now. He took off downstairs and opened the door. I stayed up here because I thought it was a burglar. But when I heard a familiar voice yelling, I ran down there. I couldn’t see around Jake because he was so big, but when I got closer to the door I could see Liam in his face screaming. “Let me see her!” “No, she didn’t want to talk to you, what don’t you get! Leave!” Jake would try to close the door but Liam would stop him. I was surprised by his strength, I’ve never seen him like this. “Jake..” My voice was barely a whisper but both boys turned and looked at me. I just nodded my head at Jake. He gave Liam one last glare and left. He went upstairs, grabbed his things and walked back out.“I’ll call you later.” I gave him a kiss and he left. He bumped into Liam’s shoulder as he walked out and left. “Liam, what do you want?” He walked into my house with his hands held up. “(Y/N), I just need to talk to you please.” 

I really looked at him, last I saw him he was drinking heavily at the club, but he did not look drunk. “Fine, come sit down.” He closed the door and came and sat by me. I just looked at him, waiting for him to talk. “Okay, I know I have no right to say this, but (Y/N) I miss you.” What the hell. No. “No Liam, you can’t tell me that. Because you know what, you’re the one who left me.” I wasn’t yelling, I was just calm. I didn’t want to fight with him. “I know that, but listen to me babe. I don’t know what I was thinking, I was in a confused state, I didn’t know what I wanted. But I know now.” “Why? Because you see me with another man? No it’s doesn’t get to be that way Liam. Why can’t I move and be happy?” “(Y/N)…” “No fuck you Liam. We were together for 3 whole years, and you break up with me on television? I have to hear from fans that we’re no longer together? Do you know how that felt Liam? All you had to do was be a man and tell me to my face. Not in front of a whole crowd, hoping that news would travel to me. Because you know what, I didn’t deserve that. I lost all respect for you. I tried calling you, I left you messages, everything, and you couldn’t call back once. Nothing Liam, so I left. What’d you think, me seeing you would change everything? No. I needed to move on with my life because you obviously had. So no Liam, don’t sit here and tell me you miss me. If you had missed me you would’ve called.” I had to get everything out, he needed to see how much he had hurt me. He sat there for awhile just looking at me. I could see his eyes watering and I couldn’t stand to see that. I hated seeing him cry, it always made me cry. “(Y/N), I love you….and I know this won’t change anything, but I love you. I don’t know what else I can say to express the guilt I’ve been feeling, the anger I’ve been feeling. But I miss you, I miss you so much. And I’ll admit, yes, seeing you with another man irritates me. Because it hurts knowing you’ve found someone else to take my place. But babe, I won’t be able to find someone else because I’m still in love with you…” He made me look at him. “I will do anything to have you back (Y/N), please. Just give me a second chance.” By now my tears were falling.

I didn’t know if I wanted to believe Liam. He hurt me once, how do I know he won’t do it again? I was scared to be honest. Scared of my love for him and me giving in so easily to him. I still love him, but do I love him enough to try again? I didn’t feel the same about Jake. Hell I was just going to have sex with him to get my mind off of Liam. Jake didn’t deserve that, but that didn’t mean Liam deserved me again. “How do I know you won’t do this again?” He grabbed my hands and squeezed them tightly. “You don’t. But you have to trust me when I say I love you with all my heart enough to not hurt you ever again. I’ve experienced what life’s like without you and I don’t want to know that feeling ever again. Please…” I sat there and just stared at the wall past him. His eyes were wide, waiting for my answer. I finally turned to him and leaned my face closer to his. I closed my eyes and kissed him. I could tell he was shocked at first, but then grabbed my hair and pulled me closer. The kiss became deeper and Liam picked me up and took me to my room. He laid me down and climbed on top of me. But before we moved on, he stared into my eyes. “Does this mean yes?” 

My heart skipped a beat every time he spoke to me. So yes, I loved this boy with all my heart. I missed him too and needed him. I nodded my head at him and smile. I could see his face relax and his smile brighten. “I love you (Y/N) and I’m so sorry.”“I love you too Liam.” 

That night was perfect. He spent the night and woke up and made me breakfast. I knew I had to call Jake and tell him it was over, so I just got it over with. He yelled at me, but other than that, we were done. I looked over to where Liam was now. He was at the stove cooking, his face lit up with joy. I smiled seeing him that again. And knowing I was the one who brought him that joy, made me even happier. Having him back meant everything to me. I just had to leave my love in the hands of Liam now. But I knew nothing would happen like that again. I made him promise me next time he’d just talk to me. He said ok but that he’d never need to do that.

4 months later..

His POV

The tour was done, I was finally able to go home. But home didn’t feel like home anymore. I don’t know why I expected (Y/N) to be there, but she wasn’t. I walked in and instantly felt the loneliness. I dropped my bags in the doorway and walked the rest of the way in. All the pictures that had her in it were gone. All her things she brought when she first moved in, gone. I looked in the bedroom and could see her whole dresser was gone, all her things out of the bathroom, everything that she had ever owned, gone. I sat down on the bed and put my head in my hands. Coming home to this, I felt a pang of guilt run through me. She must’ve taken the hint, but now I knew it was so wrong of me to do that. 

When I finally felt better, I went to get up, but then I heard a something rumpled underneath me. I looked down and saw a piece of paper. I picked it up and noticed her hand writing. My name was written on the front and I just sat there and looked at it. Debating whether or not to read it. After what seemed like 30 minutes, I finally decided to not read it. I hid it in my side drawer and moved on. I couldn’t undo what happened, I just needed to forget. 

Your POV

That night with Jake was the best night of my life. I didn’t sleep with him or anything because he wasn’t like that. No, he was truly a gentleman and made me laugh throughout the whole night. He just made me forget everything I had just been through, and it was nice. After that he called me everyday and we would go out. We hadn’t been official or anything, but recently we had made it official. And I was actually happy about it. He was nothing like Liam. They were total opposites. When Liam would get mad, he’d hold it in and not talk to anyone, Jake would talk to me and let me give him advice and he’d actually take it. When Liam and I were out in public, he didn’t like PDA, Jake didn’t mind. Liam stopped giving me roses after 2 months, Jake still bought me roses every week to replace the old ones. I was slowly falling for this guy, but still too scared for anything more. I needed to wait and see if he was right for me. 

I had heard Liam was finally home from tour, and I couldn’t help but wonder if he had gotten my letter, but then again, I shouldn’t care. Jake and I were together, I needed to focus on him. I moved out of my friend’s house and got my own place. It was just a small studio, but it worked for me. I needed to be alone sometimes. After 3 years of sharing a place with someone, it felt nice to have my space. Jake would come over and spend time with me, but never spend the night. I had told him what happened and he understood, another thing I liked about him. I just couldn’t help but think maybe it’s too good to be true?

3 days later..

Jake and I decided to go out to the club for a celebration. He had just gotten promotion and wanted to party. I was happy to follow along. All my friends and his would be there so it was good. We arrived and go in quickly, drinks were ordered and the drinking began. Everyone was taking shots after shots and just having a good time. Jake and I were out on the dance floor enjoying ourselves when I felt someone tap on my shoulder. My vision was hazy, but it didn’t take a miracle to see who it was.

His POV

2 days earlier..

I couldn’t take it anymore, I needed to read that letter. After Louis told me he had tried calling (Y/N) a few months ago and her friend telling him those things, I needed to hear it for myself. I went into my room and opened the drawer.

   Liam,

Even though I want to sit here and tell you I hate you, I can’t. Because the love I have for you will not allow me to. I don’t understand why you felt you needed to do this to me. I would’ve handled it better than I am now. I just hope you understand what you did to me. You broke my heart and my trust. Crushed everything for me, when all I ever did was love you. When you get this, please call me or see me or something, just so I can get my closure Liam. That’s all I’ll ask of you after this, just do this for me. I won’t ask you anything, I won’t say anything. And just so you know, even though you did this to me, I’ll always love you and you’ll always have a place in my heart. 

   Bye Liam,

   -(Y/N)

Closure. I could do that right? That’s the least I owed her.

Present

I sat here in this club, enjoying my time with the lads, watching over them while partying. I was having a good time until I saw a familiar face walk in. It was (Y/N), but she wasn’t alone. She had all her friends with her, and most of all, her hand was intertwined with another man’s. Jealousy instantly hit me. I don’t know why, but I didn’t expect her to have found someone so soon. I stayed where I was and just watched her from afar. She drank, a lot. She never used to do that. She danced provocative, never used to do that either. But most of all, she paid most of her attention to the guy. She looked like she was having a good time, but something in me reminded me about her letter. Closure. I’ll probably never see her again, so it’s now or never. I downed a shot and got up. 

I walked over to the dance floor and tapped on her shoulder. When she turned around, it seemed like it took awhile for her to focus, but when she finally did, her eyes widened. “Liam?” I awkwardly waved my hand. “Hi (Y/N).” She looked around me, probably looking for the boys. “What are you doing here?” “I’m here with the boys, back from tour.” All the while her boyfriend just stood there and watched the whole thing. “Is this the guy?” It was meant to be a whisper, but I heard it. Well, I guess she told him about me. “Yes……um, well it’s nice to see you Liam.” “You too (Y/N), um, can we talk, in private.” I could see her boyfriend tense up and she grabbed his hand to comfort him. “It’s okay babe…” then she turned to me, “Um Liam look, it’s nice to see you but I don’t think that’s a good idea.” “But the letter…” “Yeah I know what I said, but I’ve moved on. I’m fine. So you don’t have to do this.” She nodded at me and I took the hint. She really didn’t want to see me anymore. “Okay well, have a good night.” I walked away with my head down. I don’t know why this hurt, but it did. In 4 months she changed her mind about me and us. I thought I would be fine with this, but I’m not. 

That night I got drunker than I’d ever gotten. I needed to drink away the pain I was feeling right now, along with the guilt. The guilt needed to leave, the more guilt I had, the more it hurt.

His POV

I had just publicly said I was no longer with (Y/N). I felt guilty doing it this way, but I needed to get it out somehow. After the interview, the boys just looked at me. “Why’d you do that Liam?” It was Harry who asked. None of them knew what was going on. They had been wondering why I’d been raising my hand when asking if I was single, but I never explained. And doing that just made them even more curious. “Me and (Y/N) broke up that’s all.” “No, there’s more to the story.” “Just,”I was scared they were going to judge me, “whatever I say you guys have to promise you won’t see me differently.” I looked each of them in the eye and they all nodded but looked confused. “Okay, well, recently I’ve been having mixed feelings about her and I didn’t know what was happening. Until one day I looked at her and realized I wasn’t in love with her anymore.” They all looked taken back by this. “I know, I’ve been with her for 3 years, I don’t know what happened. But I didn’t have the heart to tell her in person……so I just did it now, hoping she’ll hear of it.” Louis shook his head. “Liam, I’m sure she’ll hear of it, but aren’t you the least bit worried about how she’ll take it? She didn’t hear it directly from you, that’s harsh what you just did. Think of all the things going through her mind right now. How could you do that?” I looked at them as they silently stood there judging me, I knew they were, they just didn’t want to admit it. All I could say was ‘I know’. After that I just walked away. I looked at my phone and looked at my recent calls. (Y/N) had called me a month ago 8 times, that’s when I started raising my hand. I couldn’t hear the heartbreak in her voice, I knew I’d break down as well. I guess I just couldn’t face my fears, but I knew it wasn’t fair to her.

Your POV

I got to (Y/F/N) and was a complete mess. “(Y/N) what happened?!” I must’ve looked like I just witnessed a murder or something because she was freaked out.“Liam…..he broke up with me.” And I started crying again. She grabbed me and pulled me into a hug. We just stood there, me sobbing on her shoulder, and her rubbing my back. “(Y/N), listen to me. You need to calm down.” She lifted up my head and told me to breathe. Slowly, my breathing became normal again, but I was still hysterical. I don’t think I could ever calm down after this. “Come here.” She walked me over to the couch and we sat. We sat there for about 4 minutes so I could gather myself. I knew I needed to tell her the story so she would understand. I took deep breaths and counted in my head. When I was finally able to speak, I told her the story. 

“No! That dick!” “It’s true. I never would’ve thought Liam would do this.” “Where’s this damn video, let me see it.” I pulled out my phone and gave it to her. She watched the video and I could see the anger building up. After it was done she just sat there and shook her head. “You guys were together for 3 years and this is how he repays you? Have you called him?” “Yes, ever since I started hearing about this, but he won’t answer me! I’ve tried millions of time (Y/F/N) but he just won’t talk to me. I just want to hear it from him, that’s all I want. If he really loved me he could tell me himself. But I just don’t understand.” I buried my face in my hands and rubbed my temples. My head was hurting so bad that I didn’t want to think about this anymore. “Can I stay here please? I know Liam’s going to be gone for another 4 months, I just don’t want to be alone.” “Of course babe, let’s just go get some of your things.” 

Louis’ POV

I couldn’t help but think about (Y/N). She didn’t deserve what he did to her. If it were me, I would’ve called her myself but he’s just been a complete ass. Knowing her so long, I felt it was my duty to call her and check on her. I locked myself in my room and dialed her number. It rang about 4 times before she finally picked up. But it wasn’t her. “Can I help you?” I looked at my phone, making sure I had the right number. “Uh, who is this?” “Is this Louis? Well Louis, I’m (Y/F/N), (Y/N)’s friend. And if you’re calling on Liam’s behalf I’d like to just tell you to tell him to go fuck himself.And she doesn’t want to talk to any of you.” “No, no, that’s not…” Then she disconnected. What the hell? 

Your POV

I woke up the next morning and found (Y/F/N) in the kitchen. She was cooking breakfast when I came in. “Hey.” “Hey, Louis called last night.” What?! “What, when?” “After you fell asleep.” “Well what’d he say?” “I didn’t let him speak, I told him to tell Liam to fuck off and for them not to call anymore. Trust me girl, it’s what’s best for you right now.” I sat there and thought about that. I guess the only way for me to move on from this heartbreak is to not talk to any of them. Because even if I just talked to Lou, I would think of Liam. Ugh, this sucked. But Lou called me, that had to mean something right? “Agreed.” “Okay good, now, we’re going out.” I shook my head. “I’m not ready for that.” “(Y/N) I am not going to let you sit around here and mope. You’re going to be ready by 7 tonight and we are going out you hear me?” I just put my head down. The things my friends made me do. “Yes mom.” 

That night I was ready and so not looking forward to this. She told me to wear a dress, so I did. I got downstairs and the rest of our friends were there. When they all saw me they hugged me, all saying they were sorry. “Ugh, you bitches better not bring this up anymore.” They laughed and said ok. We were going out to dinner then a club. I was just following along. But what I didn’t know, was that this was a date…...for me. Ugh, great. When we got to the restaurant, there were guys there. There was a guy for all of my friends, and even one for me. Was this necessary? Liam just broke up with me, I’m not ready for this. “(Y/N), meet Jake, Jake this is (Y/N).” I looked at the guy. He was very tall, light skinned, blonde hair, blue eyes, perfect smile, and a nice body from what I could tell. Nothing like Liam. He stuck his hand out. “Hi, nice to meet you.” Well his voice sounded nice, I couldn’t be mean, it just wasn’t me. I shook his hand. “You too Jake.” “Shall we?” He motioned for me to take the seat across from him, he even pulled out my seat for me. Wow, I wasn’t expecting that. Gentlemen, that’s what popped into my head.“Thank you.” He sat down across from me and everyone else sat down around us. (Y/F/N) raised her glass and we all followed. “I would just like to say (Y/N), you better give this guy a chance or I will destroy you honey.” She winked at me and drank her glass. We all threw our glasses back, the alcohol burning my throat, but it felt good. Jake looked at me and winked. I just smiled at him “You ready to have a good time?” Hmmm… “Sure, why not?”

I needed this right? Maybe Jake wasn’t such a bad guy. Maybe I shouldn’t judge him, maybe I should just try this. Ah what the hell, why not. Liam was long gone anyways right, I’ll just have to block him out.

His POV

I was slowly falling out of love with (Y/N). And it pained me to even think about that. I don’t know how it happened or why, but it just did. And the sad thing was, I didn’t know how to tell (Y/N). I didn’t want to break her heart. I was constantly thinking of ways I could tell her, but nothing. The only thing I could do was honest with her, but then again not. We’ve been together for 3 years, how do you break up with someone you’ve been with for 3 years?

Your POV

Liam and I lived together, so I would stay home while he went on tour so I could watch the house. I wasn’t comfortable going on tour with the boys, so most of the time I stayed here, and Liam respected that. That’s what I loved about him, he respected whatever I did or said. I loved him dearly. 

This time the boys were going to be gone for about 6 months touring. Each day that passes, I counted the days til Liam would come back. He’d call me every night to check on me and let me know he loves me. It was times like these when I missed him the most. I’d go hang out with friends a lot to get my mind off of things, but I’d just come home and see if there was anything new on the internet.

Today when I got home, I noticed there was a lot of talk on twitter about Liam and I breaking up. I laughed at it. There was always someone spreading that rumor about us, but I knew it wasn’t true. So I sent a tweet: ‘Guys it’s just rumors, we’re still together  xx.’ As soon as I sent that, I got a millions mentions. Most of them had video links. So I clicked on the first one. It was a video of an interview that they did in Germany. They asked the usual questions like how excited they were and who was single. When it got to that part, I expected for Liam’s hand to stay down, but it went up. What the fuck? So I watched the next one. Again, the same thing. Liam was stating that he was single in interviews. When did this happen? I looked at the date and saw that it was only 4 days ago. 

Liam stopped calling me 4 days ago, I never realized that. I had been going out a lot that I had forgotten. I watched about 3 more interviews with the same results. And in each of them, Liam was smiling when he rose his hand. I picked up my cell phone and called him. He didn’t answer. I didn’t know where the boys were now, but anytime I called, Liam would pick up. So why was he not now? I called again 3 more times, and still no answer. I was starting to get worried. The last time I left a voicemail: ‘Li baby, call me back. I just saw some interviews and noticed you raised your hand when asked who was single, can you please call back and explain? I love you babe.’ I sat there and just stared at my phone. But it never rang.

Days passed and still no call from Liam. I was constantly being tweeted, asked what happened and sent more videos. My heart was slowly breaking from this. Liam has never acted like this, why is he doing this to me. I was constantly checking his twitter, hoping to catch him online, but even when he was, he wouldn’t respond to me. What the hell? I tried asking one of the boys and they didn’t respond either. I was in a confused state by now, not knowing what to do. 

Just as I was about to go take a shower, I heard my phone go off. I looked at it, it was just another tweet. But something told me to look at this one. I opened it and it led me to another video, but in this one, Liam was actually talking in it. 

“So Liam, all the ladies have been wondering, are you really single?” His face was then filled with guilt and sadness. “Yes, yes I am.” I gasped and covered my mouth. Why would he say that? But the interviewer continued. “So you’re no longer with (Y/N)? What happened?” He took a moment to answer and never once made eye contact with the camera. “No we’re not, I guess I just fell out of love with her, and I need to move on from it.” And then the camera cut off. I stood there, crying, just looking at my phone. Liam broke up with me and I didn’t even know it. It’s been a month since I’ve heard from him, and now I know why. But why wouldn’t he just tell me? I’ve always been honest with him, why can’t he do the same in return. 

By now my tears were just pouring out. I felt so stupid for not believing those videos. Everyone knew we were broken up before me, and I just felt so used……he fell out of love with me? Since when? All these questions ran through my head as I sat there. I didn’t want to be alone so I grabbed my purse and headed to my friends house. I needed to talk to someone about this, try to figure out what just happened.

Lou’s POV
I was completely stunned that (Y/N) had just done that. I didn’t expect missing our doctor’s appointment to cause her to do that. But then again, I chose to do this. I looked at Eleanor. She just shrugged her shoulders at me and began walking back towards the car. Was it really worth it? 
I dropped off Eleanor at her house and drove home. Once I walked in, I could feel the loneliness. It was empty. I walked up to our room and there was a note on the bed. 
      -Louis,
I’ve decided I can’t be with you if you’re going to chose her over our baby. I need to look out not only for myself, but my child’s future. I’m sorry to do this to you, but I deserve better. I’ll be back in a few days to get the rest of our things.
      (Y/N).
My eyes started water and I walked over to the nursery we had set up. The door was open and as I walked in, I saw she took half of the things in there. The crib was gone, the baby’s changing station, the clothes, toys……I fell to my knees and just yelled. I yelled until my throat was sore and I couldn’t talk anymore. My heart broke reading that letter. I never meant to hurt her or our child. I never saw myself doing this to her, but I did. And I didn’t think there was anything I could do to change her mind now.

Your POV
I walked around my apartment, setting things up, cleaning and preparing. Zayn had taken me back to Lou’s to get some things and dropped me off here. When I moved into Lou’s flat, I had kept my apartment just in case I wanted to come back here…and thank goodness I did. I knew being here would be better for me and would help me move on. Of course I’m still going to be in the same town as Louis, but if he wants to be apart of his son’s life, then he can be. I sat down and thought about what happened. Louis was the father of my child and my love, but in one instant he changed my mind completely. The way Eleanor smiled at me told me she won. And in no way was I going to fight for a man who didn’t care that much for me. If Lou had really loved me, he would’ve told Eleanor no and been there with me. 
I rubbed my stomach and could him kicking. I smiled despite the anger I was feeling. My baby boy was my life now, and I had to look out him.
I waited a few days before going back to Lou’s for the rest of my things. I asked Zayn to accompany me and he said yes. We drove over and walked up together. Zayn knocked and Louis opened the door. He looked like he hadn’t slept in days, but I couldn’t let him see that I noticed that. “Can we come in?” He just nodded and stepped aside. I put my purse down and started walking up the stairs. Zayn grabbed boxes and helped me start packing up the nursery, while Lou just sat in the living room. I tried not to think about him, because I know if I did, I’d change my mind about this. “I’m gonna go grab more boxes k.” “Okay.” Zayn left and I walked over to my old room to gather my things. As I was packing, I could hear Lou come in a sit on the bed. He just sat there, looking at the ground, rubbing his hands together. My books were on the nightstand and that’s where he was by, so I had to walk in front of him to get them. As I did, he grabbed my hand and just held onto it. I stood there, not knowing what to say. He finally looked up at me and I could see the tears in his eyes. “You’re really going to leave me….” It wasn’t a question, just a statement. “Yes.” He still held onto my hand, even now and again giving it a gentle squeeze. “What, um, what is the sex of the baby if you don’t mind me asking.” I knew Louis was going to be apart of my life forever because of our baby, so it was only fair he knew now. “A boy.” His face lit up when he heard that and he finally smiled. “Really?” I nodded my head. This caused him to break down even more, to the point where he was sobbing. I kneeled in front of him and just held onto his hands. “Lou, listen to me. Just because I’m leaving, does not mean you won’t be apart of this baby’s life. Look at me,” I put my hand under his chin and lifted his head. “He is going to need his father, you are going to be there for him Lou, if not then I’m fine with that. If you choose to never see him, I won’t hate you. But I would very much like it if you were apart of his life.” He cried more and nodded his head. “Lou I love you, but this is going to be better for us. You’ll always have a place in my heart and I’ll always love you because you are my son’s father, but please don’t hold this against me.” He wiped his eyes and looked at me. “I love you too.” All I could do was smile….then continue to pack my things. “Alright, everything’s packed.” I looked over to Zayn and smiled. He went back downstairs to leave me with Lou. I got up and pulled him up with me. “It’s not goodbye babe, I’ll be seeing you soon.” “I know..” I hugged him and he held onto me for as long as he could. Finally he let go and just looked at me. 
I knew I was doing the right thing for myself, and for Lou. He needed to know he could move on with his life and still be apart of mine. “I’ll let you know when the next doctor’s visit is.” “Okay.” And with that, I left. I got into the car and finally let some tears slip. I was going to miss his body next to mine, but like I said, he’d always be in my life.

2 Years Later..
Jacob Daniel Tomlinson, the newest edition to our family, and the cutest. I loved my son so much, and so did Lou. He never missed a doctor’s appointment after that day, and ever since he’d been born, he’s been there. He was showing me and and his son, that he was dedicated. And I couldn’t be more proud. Every time I saw Lou playing with Jacob, I felt relaxed. He didn’t flake on us, he didn’t show hesitation. He was there for us, and so were all the other boys. I still went to their houses, went out to eat with them, everything. Nothing changed, just me and Lou. I could occasionally see Lou looking at me with love in his eyes, but he knew my decision. I didn’t want a love relationship with him, just a friendship. He understood and never brought it up. And our relationship had never been better.